Owners of their own pleasure: did you know that women also pay for sex?

“Women don’t pay for sex because there is always someone interested in them.” This is what many people think when it comes to women hiring escorts. There is this myth that every woman always has at least a small list of men interested in her, but unfortunately it’s not true, I know from experience, and even if there is, it’s almost never men that we’re also interested in, and it turns out that I’m not even talking about high demands, even basic education is lacking.

And assuming we had this incredible list (which I’ve never even seen), we also want practicality, we also have desires and curiosity just like men who hire sex workers.

Lately (if it hasn’t always been this way), sexually free and determined women, empowered, independent, and when it comes to appearance, even the tallest ones (my case) have certain difficulties finding someone, whether serious or casual, and depending on the Men themselves, they scare, intimidate, and there is still the thought of “she must already have several people after her, I’m not even going to try” and that’s what everyone thinks, and no one tries anything.

On this International Women’s Day, I bring you Carla’s point of view on all this, a 37-year-old project manager, single, living in São Paulo, who started having experiences with male escorts and has since become a fan of the service.

When and how did the desire to hire an escort first arise?

“At the end of the pandemic, in 2021, I resumed using dating apps to try to meet new people. The encounters were so frustrating that I even considered hiring an escort for the first time. But the stereotype of professionals on the streets of São Paulo at night came to my mind, as that was the reference I had. The imaginary scene of driving alone at night, looking for a stranger on a corner to take to the motel made me apprehensive and afraid, for my safety. So I discarded the idea.”

Where did the search begin?

“I didn’t exactly go looking, it was the algorithm that found me. One night, I was watching reels suggested by Instagram. Going through several in sequence, one in particular caught my attention. It was a humorous video about an escort serving a client. There was nothing explicit, the tone was light and fun. I laughed at the faces and mouths, I thought it was a talented and creative idea!”

What do you look for in a service?

“Feeling desired, being treated well, being able to express my pleasure without being judged or repressed.
I’m looking for a humanized casual style, one in which we’re not treated like a piece of meat hanging in a butcher’s shop. It’s not a serious relationship but there is friendship, respect, affection, chemistry and a pleasant exchange. As a regular client, I was able to find this, because in a way, some intimacy is developed during the consultations with the same professional: in relation to topics discussed, getting to know each other’s bodies, positions that fit better, those things.
It’s like seeing an old friend with each appointment. And there are men who take their women to dinner and blurt out the phrase “just don’t fall in love” as if women were looking for that all the time.”

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