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Sex and the Escort Profession

The first time I read the phrase “I do it because I like it”, by the former call girl and at the time, a literature scholar, Lolla Benvenutti, I was shocked. What does it mean that someone likes to prostitute themselves? Then, I devoured all the content, including articles, books, and interviews that were on the internet about this escort.

Lolla gave me a new perspective on sex and also on the profession. It wasn’t a hobby for her, it was something she saw as a profession and in such a complete way. She would become an inspiration on my journey. Looking at all this sexuality with such sweetness and naturalness surprised me, but it also aroused admiration and curiosity about this prejudiced detachment from the profession of escort.

I took that into my experiences and allowed myself to look at sexuality in a natural way. However, I have never ceased to wonder why people are reluctant to accept the profession like any other and I invite you to make some reflections on the subject.

Prostitution in history

A woman with an easy life, that’s how prostitutes have been stigmatized throughout history. One of the oldest professions in the world and also perhaps the most controversial, thanks to the socio-cultural inability to accept sex as something natural in life.

Prostitution was not always judged as immoral, historical records of the profession come from antiquity, from the first signs of civilization in Mesopotamia. In an article, published in September 2019, in the column Aventuras da História, on the Uol website, journalist Bianca Nunes reports that Sumerian tablets from 2,400 BC show that the goddess of love considered herself linked to female and male prostitution.

During this period, the activity came to be practiced inside temples, sacred places of worship.

When did prostitution start here?

In Brazil, history begins to record signs of activity from the time of colonization, when marriages or concubinations between indigenous and European women already occurred. According to historian Mary del Priore, in 1549, in the absence of more women to populate the new region, Father Manoel da Nóbrega asked the king of Portugal to send orphaned girls and women considered “wrong” because they would organize marriages here. It is believed that it was after the arrival of these European women that the profession was first registered.

At the beginning of the 19th century, the place of prostitution was Rua das Casinhas, in São Paulo, which today is called Praça Manoel de Nóbrega. Yes, this is the same priest who asked Portugal for the “wrong” women at the time.

Sex and religion

It is a fact that the church has always influenced the social and moral behavior of society, dictating norms and rules. In the 18th century, according to the book Women’s Stories and Conversations, couples had to follow the church calendar, which referred to sexual restrictions on certain days of the week, during Lent, on pregnant women and also on menstrual days, because “they believed that they could produce leper children,” according to the author.

This is just one small example of how religion has affected the sex life of our society. There are still women who deprive themselves of fulfilling their sexual desires with their own husbands because they believe that it is a sin to deviate from what is considered normal, that is, only sex with mom and dad.

A combo of taboos

If we put all these factors together and add up the deprivation of women in relation to the same rights of sexual freedom that men have always had, we can understand why there is all the prejudice surrounding the profession. A woman who enjoys freedom over her body is always judged more than a man.

Therefore, a prostitute, whether cis or trans, will always suffer greater prejudice than a male prostitute, as she already carries the stigma of her sexual gender.

Another determining factor in changing social perspectives is how the companions themselves feel about their work. Many of them, unlike a Lolla Benvenutti in life, are victimized by their profession, justifying themselves with a lack of job opportunities or financial need. If not even the professionals themselves wear their shirts, it is difficult to convince a society to change its concept.

Where to start the change?

Imagine for a few seconds that a blackout occurred in your brain and you were forced to learn all over again, imagine that all the repressed sex education was erased. Now imagine, that in this new reality, sex is a well-being, both physical and emotional, and that all people of all genders are free to fulfill themselves sexually.

Perhaps, within this panorama, where sex could indeed be something beneficial, the profession will free itself from the objectification of women and prejudice.

It all depends on how willing people are to understand that old religious beliefs and sexual reproach need to remain in the past and not be continued by the new generations. We are living in an era where emotional well-being plays a key role in human development, and clinging to old prejudices only leads to suffering for those who repress and/or are repressed.

It is possible to enjoy the profession of escort, if you try to understand how good a moment of sex, affection or just a chat can be for the person you are looking for. She doesn’t pay for the body, she pays for confidentiality, for time, and for discretion. What you do in the bedroom isn’t always sex, and even if it is, from the point of view that sex is only good, then what’s wrong with that